Vanity

Uncle Harold

mikemjensen Shame on Me, Vanity Tags: , , , , 2 Comments

Hey Kids,

Recently I’ve been drawn to military stories, documentaries, movies and the like. I’ve always been interested but for whatever reason the interest became heightened.

I find myself reflecting on the scenes described or shown and I try to imagine what any of it was like. What would I be, how would I act, how would I survive, and if I did, how would I cope?

Many of the scenarios I imagine, even as far from reality as someone whose never seen a battle can guess; I do not fare so well. I know I want to, but I have no context in which I can pretend I would be anything great. I hope I’m wrong. And I hope I never know.

I think of those who did not make it. The young ones who ended their lives so suddenly and so short. The good and the bad. What a loss. What a loss for their families. What a loss for humanity. Another person who might have a valid opinion when a country thinks of war. Another person who understands the price.

Yesterday I remembered that I have an uncle who did not return from WWII. Obviously I never met him and he died when my mother was 3, she did not know him either. I have no idea who he was, what he thought, or what he could have become. But I know he died. And I know that other than a faint memory of visiting his gravesite (headstone actually, his body is in the Philippines), I’ve never paid any respects to him.

11329966_772156879564101_2161782549950359240_nI corrected this today, I found his headstone, near to my grandparents. It was heavily over grown and soiled with sod, dirt and mildew. My baby and I cleared out from around the flush mounted stone; as much as we could with our hands and paid our respect. I’m ashamed that I haven’t done this before today and I will be returning to do some long-term maintenance later on.

I am proud, of what of what my country was asked to do. The US has some faults and political decisions sometimes cloud our values and desires as a people but as a whole, I’m proud.

The sacrifice of my Uncle Harold will never be realized by me. But I know that a cost was paid by our family. As was many families. And by many families from many nations. Those who gave must know that the world is a better place because of it.

I hope that the US will never be required to sacrifice 450,000 people again. I hope my family never loses another member to a war. But I’m proud to say when they were, we gave.

Thank you Uncle Harold. I hope that one day I can learn and reclaim what we lost. I’m very proud of you.

 

Day 91

 

45 Minute Reward

mikemjensen Vanity Tags: , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

So a weird thing happened today.

IMG_20150523_093506_285 (1)I set up, ready to work on the motorcycle this morning. Jack in place, tools lined up, and schedule set. I wanted to have the front wheel off and at the door of the shop the moment they opened to have the new tire mounted and balanced.

The forecast called for rain. The skies were gray but nothing yet. In fact, it looked like the rain had worn itself out overnight and brighter skies lined the western horizon.

Let’s get it done!

I looked up. A small, and I mean small, little girl stared at me from behind my neighbor’s parking stall. She was maybe 3. Shorts, t-shirt, and no shoes. Her dark hair hung in nappy curls on her little Polynesian head.

She stared at me with a confused look, maybe surprised to see me. I had seen her before but usually at a distance with her mother and siblings around her. I think they live in the next building over from my 6-plex.This morning she was alone.

Her eyes began to well up with tears and her lip quivered.

I asked what she was doing out there by herself, and why was she in the roadway. She continued to stare and the tears began to streak down her cheeks.

She seem relieved when I walked to her but never spoke a word to give an answer to any of my questions. She took my hand and led me to walk with her.

Thinking her feet might be cold on the wet asphalt, I offered to pick her up. She accepted and nestled against my neck with large sobs.

I knocked on the apartment I thought her family lived. Their car was gone and no one answered. At 7:30 on a Saturday morning, I dared not randomly knocking on other doors.

Not knowing what else to do, and thinking she might be cold, I took her home.

After a short period of time, I got her to stop crying but she clung to me like I was her only chance at safety. Ever. She wanted nothing to do with anyone else at my place but me. She did accept an Easter hold-over offer of M&M’s.

At last after maybe 45 minutes of custody, we saw a possible family member, possibly looking for a lost child. Turned out to be her grandmother. The little girl forsook me for her. I wasn’t insulted but missed her immediately.

I waved and she waved back as she was toted off to her home and greeted by her siblings who stared at me like I had taken her. Hopefully they eventually heard the real story.

I went back to work on the bike and showed up late at the shop. It didn’t matter, they got the wheel right in and done.

The bike works again. The little girl got home. And I feel a lot better about the day. More than expected going into it.

It’s OK to disrupt a schedule to help someone else. And I felt special that she took to me and I provided her safety when she knew not what to do. Is there anything better than doing something for someone that can never repay you?

But thinking back on today and writing about it. I guess I did get repaid.

I was a dad again for 45 minutes.

 

Day 89

1984

mikemjensen Life's Truths, Vanity Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

1984.

That’s the year I graduated from high school. To most others it’s the title of a book.

The term Big Brother? That’s where that term came from. Check it out it’s a good book.

I remember learning about 1984 sometime around 1980. A teacher explained to us all how close the book was to how it was and within the next four years, she feared we would be living in that world.

Not exactly. The 1980’s turned out to be nothing like 1984. I know some people are going to say different; but no, the world of Winston Smith was nothing like the world I knew leaving High School. Or even today.4c61d4a15e78164dc9ce5fe53750e28f6d4c9ec6

1984 is also the name of a Van Halen album. The last one with David Lee Roth as the lead singer or band member. Personally, I liked Sammy Hagar a little better anyway, but “1984” is an incredible album, one that changed the direction of Van Halen and rock music really. The song “Hot for Teacher” alone is worth the listen.

The 1984 Olympics. Remember that runaway? With the Eastern Bloc countries boycotting, the USA, In LA, won a lot of medals. McDonald’s nearly went broke with just the free stuff I won from the promotion they ran. Big Mac for a Gold, fries for a Silver and a drink for a Bronze. I spent an entire weekend at Santa Cruz feeding off the winnings of Team USA. I still feel sorry, however, for Mary Decker. But how about that Michael Jordan kid!

1984 was a big year. The launch of Apple Macintosh for one. But it was only a year. It came and went. No Party take over. No new world order. No Walter Mondale. And no societal crash.

2015 is another year. What will be historic about it? Only history in the future(?) will tell. The trick is just to live it. Take things as they come and know that one day there will be something of today we will look back with fond memories.

Nobody really knows what’s coming. No body.

So, Relax. (Don’t do it).

 

Day 84

Birthday- Choose Your Flavor

mikemjensen Life's Truths, Vanity Tags: , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

About a year ago, a family member gave me my first Sourdough start, something I’ve had the idea of doing for a number of years. Thus began a learning curve.

Sourdough is not a bread. It is a process to make bread products. Before packaged yeast, this is how it was done. It has a distinctive flavor but how strong that flavor is manifested depends on how you use the process.

The process and use of Sourdough also has a cult following. People spout off hard and fast rules of how to feed it, how to use it, how to store it. Pride is taken in the age of your start.

Starter Gone Wild!

Starter Gone Wild!

Starter is placed in a fridge or container in the kitchen and fed and kept “alive”. Some people insist you name it. Some insist you treat it like a pet.

As I delved into the Sourdough world, I have been finding that there are pieces of truth within the rules but a lot of Hooey is also added.

Here’s some things I’ve learn and adopted into my personal Sourdough Religion:

Age of the start doesn’t really matter. 10 years. 30 Years. Or even my started that can be traced back 50 years. It just matters that you feed it. How you feed it makes a difference.

It’s not better than yeast. In fact, yeast is faster and more consistent. Sourdough is a process that creates its own characteristics. I love the flavor, and that’s why I do it.

It doesn’t have to be sour. How you feed it seems to be what changes the flavor. If you want sour- make it sour. If you don’t want it not sour, make it not sour.

It’s kind of hard to kill. I heard how you have to be so careful not to kill your starter. Do you have a fridge? Can you remember to do a 10 minute task, once or twice a month? If yes, you’re golden. If not, you probably shouldn’t have pets either.

Why am I going on about Sourdough?

I made Sourdough Pancakes this morning for breakfast. And it was my Birthday.

And the connection?

Being the wise old age of 49 today, I have a few years to think back upon. And I’ve been thinking.

It really doesn’t matter how you do life, just do it. There are some Life’s Truths that you are better off heeding, but it’s not always clear what’s Life’s Truths and what is someone’s add-on.

Live it and when something works, go with it.

Create your own flavor of life.

And always have Sourdough Pancakes for your Birthday.

P.S. Today was awesome. Thanks to Social Media, I got more Birthday wishes that I have ever got before. I’m feeling pretty good. Almost looking forward to number 50. Almost.

Day 83

Birthday Week- Saturday

mikemjensen Gratitude, Vanity Tags: , , 1 Comment

Hey Kids,

Saturday of my Birthday Week. Last day, I promise. All week I’ve been listing things I’m thankful for and things that make getting older worth the effort.

Saturday- My Faith.

Faith means a lot of things to different people. To me it means those things that I believe, hope, or count on deep in my thoughts, emotions, and feelings. It extends beyond the question to which religion you subscribe. It’s more than a set of do’s and don’ts. It’s the feeling of how and why.

Manti Utah Temple which some of my ancestors help to build

Manti Utah Temple which some of my ancestors help to build

I’ve been raised Mormon and I cherish the heritage that gave me. Beyond belonging to a group of people from a particular family or country, I belong to a history of people who chose to be together, who struggled together, and who put their faith in things beyond the conventional possibilities. I’ve been blessed with this association for my entire life. (Sometimes plagued, I confess.)

As a child I learned to trust the happenings around me. Persevere and move forward, better things await those that do.

As a teenager, I kept myself out of a lot of trouble (not all). Some that might’ve affected my life in undesirable ways.

I remember as an 18 year old, new to the construction site, I was designated to hold the weekly football bet money. Several hundred dollars were put in my trust, over the weekend, not because they knew me, but because they knew I was Mormon. It taught me to be true to what I claimed as my values in all times, especially when others counted on it.

My Faith took me to France and Switzerland and taught me French. A lesson I will never forget.

My Faith has given me the encouragement to carry on through in justices in the world. A belief that the ultimate justice would be based on how I acted on a day-to-day basis and not in a tally for tally, eye for an eye method in what was fair in the world. It gave me a compass.

My Faith has allowed me to ask questions, to challenge my own Faith, to dig deep for answers and when lines don’t meet, dig deeper, to relax when things aren’t perfect, and believe and hope that one day it will be.

I’ve stated a very big, private part of me in just a few sentences. I don’t mean to trivialize it but to just give a small glance into why I think it’s the growth of that faith that I look forward to as I get older. I wonder what questions I don’t even know how to ask yet.I fear and anticipate with hope to see what Faith has to offer in the future.

At least, that’s what I believe anyway.

Day 82

Birthday Week- Friday

mikemjensen Fishing, Gratitude, Vanity Tags: , , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

It’s Friday on my Birthday Week and I’m listing some things I’m thankful for in my life; those things that make getting older, worth it.

Friday- Fishing.

Green River, Utah

Green River, Utah

I probably lost some people with this one but fishing has been such a part of my life that I can’t imagine my life without it.

Fishing is what brought me and my grandpa closer. We spent many hours on his boat and it is there I learn who he was. Many people have a different opinion of the man than I do, and they are most likely right in their own views. He had some problems. But he had a good heart and out on the boat I got to feel it.

Flyfishing as I mostly do now, is as much therapeutic as it is sporting. A book I read, Pavlov’s Trout, makes the case that within the practice of regular fishing trips, a balanced happy life can be achieved. The ironic part about this is that my Ex gave that book to me and she did not agree with the philosophy that I gleaned from it. The book also gave me my dying wish. After hooking a massive Steelhead, I hope my last words are “Get the Net.”

Looking forward, I know I will never be guide quality. It’s OK. There are so many fish I want to meet, I need another 70 years from now to get to only some of them. I’ll take what live gives me and call it good.

I hope it’s closer to 70 than it is to 7, however.

Day 81

Birthday Week- Thursday

mikemjensen Gratitude, Vanity, Writing Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

It’s Thursday on my Birthday Week and I’m still listing the things I thankful for and the things that make getting older, worth it.

Thursday- Writing.

I’m not all that sentimental or hocus pocus-y when it comes to writing. I have my weird things I do, but no charms, tokens, or rituals. I simply enjoy writing. That’s it. And for that I’m thankful.

Me at 15 in Alaska looking for gold.

Me at 15 in Alaska looking for gold.

From roaming the western deserts with my dad, to working at a gold mine in Alaska, there are a few things that I’ve seen that I want to share. God gave me the eye to see the stories around me, to think of them in terms to explain to others. I have enough brain to be able to string words together into coherent thoughts and sentences.

I struggled with English in school, yet somehow it made sense to me when I learned French.

I resisted reading when I was young yet found authors like Twain, Hemingway, and London that captured my imagination.

I feared writing yet found a voice in learning to speak in Toastmasters and other public speaking occasions.

I hope I have many more birthdays between now and when I think I’m done writing. Which will only stop when I stop breathing.

Literally.

Day 80

Birthday Week- Wednesday

mikemjensen Gratitude, Motorcycles, Vanity Tags: , 2 Comments

Hey Kids,

Birthday Week continues into Wednesday and instead of wishing, I’m listing the things I’m thankful for and the things that make getting older, worth it.

Wednesday- Motorcycles.

I’ve been blessed with not one but now two motorcycles. I know this sounds materialistic. It is. But motorcycles give me a joy that’s worth being honest about it and saying I’m proud to be a motorcyclist.

Suzuki Boulevard

Suzuki Boulevard

I bought the first one in April of 2011. My Boulevard. We’ve put many miles on the road together. It’s now approaching 46,000 miles on the bike, most of them mine. I’ve spent as long as 6 days on road. Just me and my sweetie, 1200 miles, and most of the National Parks in Southern Utah and the Grand Canyon. I road it to LA and back. The trip back, 700+ miles, straight shot, 12 hours, snow and rain most of the way. Ah, memories.

IMG_20141011_084232My Yamaha is a new comer, bought last fall. The 113 cid motor (1900cc) is all the power I need for now and it’ll be the long road tripper now. The Boulevard will maintain the daily work commute duties. The Stratoliner or “Strat” is a beautiful bike and its extra-long wheel base eats up the road with comfort. I can’t wait to see where we will go together.

I know that there are many people who look at me weird because I have two bikes and no operating four wheel vehicle, but it’s the choice I made. I may not be a “biker” but I bet I ride my bikes more than most. And I hope to stick around for a lot more miles and a few more bikes in the Garage.

Ride on, Brother. Ride on.

Day 79

Birthday Week- Tuesday

mikemjensen Gratitude, Vanity Tags: , , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

Birthday Week continues into Tuesday and more things worth getting older.

Tuesday- My Kids.

Me and my babies at "our lake"

Me and my babies at “our lake”

I don’t get to see them anymore, at least for now. They’re a big reason why I write this blog (hence “Hey Kids”). I want them know one day who I am, and not who they thought I am or been led to believe I am. I want a history of my thoughts, my daily writings, and my dreams and fears.

I regret not a day in having them. I begrudge not a thing that I couldn’t have because we had to buy diapers, formula, shoes, clothes, and the like.

I don’t pine for a single event I missed because we bought a minivan instead. I loved every minute spent with them and I hurt for every moment I’m now denied.

I’m grateful they, you, are doing well from what I’m told. I’m proud of who you are becoming. And I look forward to waiting this all out and seeing you and my grandkids later on.

I’m happy to know that not a mean thought is spent on you. My arms are open, my heart is longing, and not a minute of my time will be spent seeking recompense. I’m sorry for how you were hurt, but I’m willing to do what I can to ease your pain and gain your forgiveness.

I’m happy to be alive and seemingly in good enough health to keep going for a while. I’m here until God takes me or we find our way back into each other’s lives. Whatever comes first.

My wish is for the later.

 

Day 78

A Good Time To Come Along

mikemjensen Interesting Stuff (to me anyway), Internet, Vanity Tags: , , , , Leave a comment

Hey Kids,

You know what’s cool? Living in an age where almost any piece of information is available within minutes on the Internet. (Remember when we called it the “Web” or the Information Super Highway?)

I check the online weather radar on the days when we have storms moving though and try to skirt home between the downpours. It worked great today.

on-the-internet-nobody-knows-youre-a-dog-memeCan’t remember some name or factoid? Google what you know and you’re an instant genius.

TED talks. A bunch of them are full of crap, but I learn constantly by streaming them at my desk as I do data entry.

Today I heard about a WWII story that I had never heard before. Looked it up, found out some details, learned of a detailed book of the event, and pondered the thought of writing a future book about it. Without the internet, it would’ve been a passive story that I half-understood and most likely forgot before I had a chance to research.

I think some of the things from the past are sorely missed and I wonder how life passed in old west times. However, I’m thankful to live in this day and age where the world and all its wonders are right there on my screen.

And to think how cool I thought digital watches were when they first came out.

 

Day 74