Life’s Truths

Extra Miles

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Hey Kids,

Are our lives made up of a finite amount of time?

As I work the night shift and my days become 20-21 hour affairs, I wonder if maybe I’m wearing down my total and it only means I die sooner.

Or, like exercising, do I build on that count and extend, or at least extend the healthy, active part of it.

Is it finite for each person? Or does it change?

The funny thing is that we’ll never know so I can have any opinion I desire.

I think our time is a combination of “use it or lose it” and “Add on value available.”

I know each body, like most mechanical things has a wear factor. Little variations can cause long term wear patterns, or be so built that practically no wear occurs. Like a car engine.

Why do some cars go seemingly forever, some with maintenance and some without? The engine just keep racking up the miles. Yet others, well maintained, crap out early in their life?

It’s called luck of the draw. Good luck vs. bad luck. God’s smile or God’s apathy.

I figure the more I do, the more I make my body do, the more I care for it; I believe the longer it’ll keep running. Better than if I just let it sit in the garage and wait out the years to save miles.

Somethings will break. Sure. But watch the oil, water and tire pressures and I think the seals will stay fresh and the parts all greased. In the end, I hoping to see more countryside.

Saving the miles lacks the scenery. It gives no promise for longevity. Plastics harden and engines dry out. There may not be any road scares, but if you wait too long, starting the car can be a challenge and sometimes impossible.

I’m living an extra 5-6 hours a day. It makes the days long and they stretch out into long weeks. I’m happy. I feel productive. I feel like I’m taking charge of things of which I need.

Don’t tell me I need more sleep. I ain’t got time for that.

 

Day 299

And The Verdict is In

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Hey Kids,

The time arrived for the much awaited MRI and hearing test. The results were mixed.

On the MRI front, no growths could be seen so it’s believed there are none. It was the most remote cause of the loss and yet the worse. This is the best news of the day. Unless something drastically changes, this aspect will not be revisited. Yay!

With the tumor question answered, it is assumed that the cause of the hearing loss is due to a viral infection. The steroids delivered two weeks ago were the best answer known to reverse the damage. To see if the 14 days of pumping my body full of the nasty little pills, we conducted a hearing test. Compared to the first test, it could be determined if any improvement was realized over the treatment. The results were negative. The hearing is lost and the steroid treatment will not be continued. Boo! (Yay! on no more steroids, but Boo! that it didn’t work. I wanted to be clear on that.)aldabighearingaid

So now it’s a matter of dealing with it. I’ll start testing next week to explore the effectiveness of hearing aid devices. If reasonable hearing can be achieved, that’s what I’ll do. There are several different approaches and possibly cost concerns, but I’ll cover those aspects of the journey in the future when it happens.

There is a small chance that the hearing might come back on its own. It’s extremely remote and no cause for which to attach false hope. It is also why I am pressing forward now and not waiting to see if a miracle happens. Not that I’m asking for one. There are way more important things to “miracle” in this world.

The ringing and hypersensitivity are part of ear’s the defense mechanism that keeps getting tripped. When we hear a noise that might be damaging, our ears know how to protect themselves by plugging up. That’s what’s happening. It’s believed this defensive move will eventually return to normal.

There you have it for now.

Thank you for everyone who expressed their best wishes and wished and requested blessings on my behalf. I’m touched.

 

Day 298

I Do Have Feet

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Hey Kids,

I apologize for two things today.

1) For the timing of this blog. There are a few times that I do not get the blog posted before midnight. But to keep the dates straight, I back post it to the 11 o’clock hour of the previous day. Recently I have used my lunch hour at 2 AM to finish and post the blog. Sometimes it’s what I need to do.

2) Today is one of those days. I had a bad health day and it really occupied my attention. Outside of staying put and watching boring daytime TV, I tried to do nothing and I’m afraid this post may suffer from that practice.

I’ve done some complaining recently. I thought I was experiencing the worse. Today taught me it can always get worse. I wish now I had enjoyed the “good times” earlier in the week.It+could+be+worse+_a89785118b8de0a86d10193db23a6b3d

That sounds depressing, but really; I need to just take what’s being given to me and be glad for it.

A friend of mine used ot repeat a saying his father used to tell him.

“I complained about having no shoes until I saw the boy with no feet.”

Yeah, that.

 

Day 297

If You Can’t Win, Don’t Lose

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Hey Kids,

You can’t always win, so don’t lose.

A good loss every now and then just makes the wins sweeter. So with that in mind, don’t be a poor loser. If you get beat, tip your hat, consider what you can do better, and win it next time.jordan

If you find yourself on a losing streak, don’t let it get you down. Keep your cool, accept it, own it, and keep getting better. As one person told me once: “Don’t let the bastards get you down.”

Suck it up, keep your pride, and don’t lose anything important like dignity, respect, or the will to continue fighting.

 

 

Day 296

Rivalry

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Hey Kids,

One of the great things about sports is the release of emotions.

I dare to say for some, even many, the experience of a sporting event is as much as a lesson in humanities as is a stage performance or display of artwork.

Within the confines of the rules and conditions of a structured game, the human spirit, intellect, and abilities are put to the test against the outside elements, others, and/or oneself.

Challenges are faced and overcome or they remain insurmountable. Challengers are either conquered or surrendered to. Battles are won or lost. The collective battles are added up for a final tally and a winner declared.

And then repeated.

The importance of these arenas rests in the values of each individual. Those sporting events where the results induce a greater emotional outcome, easily become or favorites. These are he challenges that present the most likelihood of failing, and thus the greater joy in the victory.

In sports, when we face our rival, the thought of failure is unacceptable. It burns our soul. To lose, is to admit your failure in the stocks of declaring your purpose and failing. You invested and lost. The wound will never heal, even with future victories. Your wound is mocked and derided and preserved for any to recall and recount. A wound enjoyed by anyone desiring, without any chance to expunge.

This is a rivalry.raiders win

Tonight, I’ll go to bed, happy that for this night, a rival has been vanquished. An enemy that has tortured my soul for the eight previous battles will feel the same pain.

What is the humanity lesson? It’s better to win. Although the wounds of the past remain painful when thought upon, they need not be thought upon while in the sight of fresh wounds of my enemy.

I never said that humanity lessons are always nice.

 

Day 293

Hear No More

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Hey Kids,

I don’t want to make more of this than there is, but I lost my ability to hear in my left ear.

It was a sudden development, but the bottom line is that I can’t hear anything in 50% of my hearing apps.lisa_bird_flt-lrg.en

I’ll go tomorrow and get more answers and prognosis. I hope to know tomorrow whether this is temporary or permanent. I would be lying if I said I was unconcerned or not worried. I’ll confess, I’m a little rattled at the thought of losing my hearing, even if only by 50%.

What really gets me thinking is a common thought. Life is so uncertain and so short. One never knows what tomorrow will bring so don’t worry about it.

Be thankful today. Be active today. Be alive today.

 

Day 283

Full Forward Reverse

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Hey Kids,

I believe in dreams.

And I believe in pursuing said dreams. But there is a big fat reality with which we must all reckon, the need of money. For me that need has turned into a second job. I am in training now to be an overnight stocker at a large retailer.wallyworld1

It is the exact opposite direction that I had hoped for. But it is the answer for the moment.

I’ll still work at my writing. I have a book that’s in the works that I can’t quite get to a point that I want to let it out. It’s just not good enough. And my first book, although well liked by those who have read it, is not really selling enough to be a reliable source of income.

So instead of working towards financial independence and working for myself, I will trade some hours for money.

It’s ok. I’m not crying about it. Sometimes a man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. And currently, my hourly labor is worth more than my written words in a book. It’s cool. This world don’t owe me anything.

I don’t owe it anything either and I believe this all will change one day. I’m just going to keep plugging along.

Until then, I’ll take their money.

 

NaNoWriMo: 38,801/50,000

Day 277

My City of Lights

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Hey Kids,

You know that you spent a day in a bubble when it’s late at night and you find that Paris has suffered a major terrorist attack and you knew nothing about it.

There’s enough news out there about what has happened and there’ll be more that comes of it in the next few days, so I won’t try to be CNN.

Instead, let me tell you of the Paris I know.Notre+Dame

I spent two separate stints in Paris, both of only two days and one night. Paris was the city I always dreamed of. The Eiffel Tower, Notre Dame, the Sacré Coeur, Les Champs-Elysées; they all lived up to and exceeded my expectations.

The city is beautiful. It has a look and a charm that is so French, so Paris. No other city is like it.

I’m saddened to hear of the tragedy, but I hope no one runs scared. If you want to see Paris, go see it. You will not regret it, nor forget it.

And by the way, shortly after my first trip to Paris is when several bombs exploded on the trains. I still went again.

 

NaNoWriMo: 19,504/50,000

Day 263

There’s Some Good Kids Out There

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An 11 year old, LaDarius Wylie lunged and pushed his little 7-year old sister out of the way of an errant car while waiting at the bus stop. The car hit him instead. He died.lw

He always took care of his sister, his family later said.

“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”

Or his family.

I thought this story needed at least one more mention.

NaNoWriMo: 8,926/50,000

Day 256

Can Do

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Hey Kids,

In a weird twist of reason, it was determined that Pirates of the Caribbean would be a good Halloween movie to watch this evening. The first movie, The Curse of the Black Pearl, more specifically was the selection.

I planned on not watching the movie and to set off to do my own thing. I ended up watching the entire movie.

Somewhere around one third/ halfway mark, there’s a scene I really like.

Jack Sparrow tells William Turner that the only thing that matters in this world is what a man can do, and what a man can’t do.

He explains that he could, in response to Will threatening him with the sword, just leave him dangling by the boom, over the ocean, until he eventually falls into the sea. But he couldn’t dock the ship at their destination by himself. So he brings him back on board. Now he can dock the ship, provided that Will decides he can follow the directions of a pirate, or not. In other words, your decisions of what you can do can determine what you can’t afterwards. Choose your actions carefully.

On a similar line, Henry Ford said: “Whether you think you can or think you can’t—you’re right.” A problem is not insurmountable nor does a dream die, until you quit.

I say if it needs to be done, do it. There’s no excuse for not rolling up your sleeves and doing whatever is needed from you.

None.

 

Day 250