Hey kids.

It’s been quite a week or so. During the current pay period, I’m now 2 days ahead in the amount of hours worked over what would be normally expected. I also feel like I’m two days short in living.

The money is good, but the loss of time is expensive. What might I have done with that time for myself. Instead, I cashed it in. It’s a terrible habit to get into. But then again money buys the things I like. Getaways, dinners and movies with my favorite person in the world, my wife; and the ability to keep the lights on, the heater warm, and the vehicles working. For all the evil money might bring, it can bring good things too.

I had a dream recently. In this dream I had the impression that I would only live to 57. That gives me 4-5 years. What am I doing with those years? Where is this trajectory heading? Is that much time enough? What if that really is all I have?

I know it was just a dream. But it makes me think. What if it isn’t.

I work for the dumbest department ever. I leave work almost every day shaking my head and wishing I could just walk away. Not almost every day, but every day. It’s must be what it’s like to play on a professional sports team that really sucks. You get the game, you can try your best, but the collective effort from the team is lacking. Lacking to the point that it’s laughable. I’m struggling to want to step in the batters box, knowing that the pitcher can just pitch around you. And if he doesn’t, your hits, or number of hits don’t matter because no one is batting behind you to drive you around the bases for a run. And even if you do score a run every now and then, your pitching sucks. You just hope the organization trades for better people around you, or maybe even trade you off to a contender.

The trade wire is quiet.

So I have a few more seasons to win a championship. Or maybe just a batting title. Or even a golden glove. Is there still enough gas in the tank? Is there a way to rise above or away from a losing team? Is there still a dream to realize?

I must try.

To not would be like a called third strike.